So ive finally got everything moved into my bigger, better bedroom! it looks so clean and tidy! still have a few things to do to it, like finish putting all the small things away, sorting out the wiring for the telephone and internet, and get my book selfs taken down and put up in my new room. but it looks good!
Met up with Elly on wednesday, and thursday... was so much fun! was meant to be meeting her yesterday in town, but she didnt come in, and didnt answer her phone all day... I was really upset :( Someone remined me how little time we have til valentines day, and I want to do something special. Its also on a saturday this year which is good. So im thinking of doing what i was gonna do last friday! Shanghi 30's for dinner! Theres other stuff, but Elly reads this so Im not saying any more!
In other news, Faith and Woodzy are now official, which has pissed off jam jam, Lewis and Cat have broken up and me and zack think theres something going on between him and tasha, but not sure on that one yet! Matthew and Megan are back together as well. lmfao
Now for the pub news. As of this week I am only working monday nights. My hours have been cut that much. I understand why Ron has done it, and he does need to make some money, but after all ive done for that pub i deserve more! The new owner is officially taking over on the 29th, but Ron is staying on and we are gonna see how it all goes. I've more then likely got my job there, but ive heard that he is closing down for 6 weeks to have the place redone. Which it needs doing, but it leaves me with no work and therefore no money!
There isnt much else really! Getting my student loan in 2 weeks which will be a great financial help. It means i can finally get my bills paid and sort out my website which has been down for a while!
Will write gain soon!
Love you Elly xxxxx
Peace x
Monday, 19 January 2009
Wednesday, 14 January 2009
the joyness of her... and bedrooms
Woooooooooo
Ok, Im happy for many reason, and not all of them relating to the love of my life! Firstly.... My nan has said I can finally move into the front bedroom, which is like 2 and a half times bigger then my room! So that will be great, wanna paint it and stuff first, and should be in there within 2 weeks! Will be great to have the space to actually stand up, turn around, and not bump into something!
In other joyness related news, me and Elly had a long convo about the whole "not saying love you" thing, as well as the no kissing in public, and the fact she was in love with someone else. Well... the long convo basically explained that shes now over the "other guy". I wont mention his name, but i also know who it is. She's also saying "I love you" now, which means so much to me, and we had a chat about the kissing thing, and i see her point, but she said she would work on it!
Meeting Elly after her exams today, and shes finally coming back to mine! I've tidied my bedroom, and am airing it out so it doesnt stink of cigarettes for her. hehe....
Also met this kool girl... Ali.... we met last friday, shes a friend of beths, and me, elly, beth, josh and ali all went back to beths, with a dominos pizza or two, and it was nice to relax and chill out like that. me, elly and Ali were doing three way kisses which was kool, and i stood back and watched elly make out with Ali, and umm... yeah! two stunningly beautiful girls, one being my girlfriend, making out in front of me... im not complaining... just which us three were alone and it went a bit further then just kissing, but hey... im not gonna complain! Ali is now going out with ben, and shes really happy, and now me and elly have sorted out the problems mentioned above, we are happy, and beth and josh seem to be happy together, despite the 60 miles of seperation.
Ive also hooked Woodzy and faith up together.... just working my match making skills again, like the good ole days! They both really REALLY like each other.... so things should work out great, that is, after woodzy finishes it with amber. I will keep you all updated on that status! Everyone seems to be pairing up recently, maybe its cos valentines day in a month?
Im off now, to pick up my wages from work... thats something I wont mention in this post, but will write about it soon!
Peace xxx
And todays tunage is...... Lacuna Coil - Self Deception
Ok, Im happy for many reason, and not all of them relating to the love of my life! Firstly.... My nan has said I can finally move into the front bedroom, which is like 2 and a half times bigger then my room! So that will be great, wanna paint it and stuff first, and should be in there within 2 weeks! Will be great to have the space to actually stand up, turn around, and not bump into something!
In other joyness related news, me and Elly had a long convo about the whole "not saying love you" thing, as well as the no kissing in public, and the fact she was in love with someone else. Well... the long convo basically explained that shes now over the "other guy". I wont mention his name, but i also know who it is. She's also saying "I love you" now, which means so much to me, and we had a chat about the kissing thing, and i see her point, but she said she would work on it!
Meeting Elly after her exams today, and shes finally coming back to mine! I've tidied my bedroom, and am airing it out so it doesnt stink of cigarettes for her. hehe....
Also met this kool girl... Ali.... we met last friday, shes a friend of beths, and me, elly, beth, josh and ali all went back to beths, with a dominos pizza or two, and it was nice to relax and chill out like that. me, elly and Ali were doing three way kisses which was kool, and i stood back and watched elly make out with Ali, and umm... yeah! two stunningly beautiful girls, one being my girlfriend, making out in front of me... im not complaining... just which us three were alone and it went a bit further then just kissing, but hey... im not gonna complain! Ali is now going out with ben, and shes really happy, and now me and elly have sorted out the problems mentioned above, we are happy, and beth and josh seem to be happy together, despite the 60 miles of seperation.
Ive also hooked Woodzy and faith up together.... just working my match making skills again, like the good ole days! They both really REALLY like each other.... so things should work out great, that is, after woodzy finishes it with amber. I will keep you all updated on that status! Everyone seems to be pairing up recently, maybe its cos valentines day in a month?
Im off now, to pick up my wages from work... thats something I wont mention in this post, but will write about it soon!
Peace xxx
And todays tunage is...... Lacuna Coil - Self Deception
Sunday, 11 January 2009
a happy depression?
Ok, so Im happy! spent both friday and saturday with Elly, and it was great! really really great, and I was so fucking happy, But today, its like... i dont know, I feel really down and depressed...
Something is bothering Elly and she wont tell me what it is, which is annoying, and its just small things really that are getting me down. Not knowing if i have a job at the end of the month doesnt help. But im really worried about what Elly is thinking... everyone says she loves me.. and she actually typed "I love you" the other night... and in english too... but then... in town, she refuses to kiss me, and she neverchats to me, and I very rarely get to see her any more. It really hurts, and i wish there wasnt such a big age gap so she could tell her mom, and i could go round hers more often. But then... she can always come round mine, but the 3 times i've offered shes had excuses not to come. Im not sayingthey are excuses, cos they could just well be genuine reasons, but still...
I just dont know what to think at the moment... my head is banging this way and that....
Something is bothering Elly and she wont tell me what it is, which is annoying, and its just small things really that are getting me down. Not knowing if i have a job at the end of the month doesnt help. But im really worried about what Elly is thinking... everyone says she loves me.. and she actually typed "I love you" the other night... and in english too... but then... in town, she refuses to kiss me, and she neverchats to me, and I very rarely get to see her any more. It really hurts, and i wish there wasnt such a big age gap so she could tell her mom, and i could go round hers more often. But then... she can always come round mine, but the 3 times i've offered shes had excuses not to come. Im not sayingthey are excuses, cos they could just well be genuine reasons, but still...
I just dont know what to think at the moment... my head is banging this way and that....
Monday, 5 January 2009
me not happy!
so, after my post from yesterday, me and Elly had a long chat, about a lot of things, not that she had read the post yet... but anyway. was speaking to her a few mins ago, and she said she cant meet me tomorrow now :( I feel like shit now! I miss her so fucking much! it really hurts! i wanna work out where this relationship is going.... is she realyl finding excuses not to see me so its easier for her to dump me? if so i wish shed do it. Im not saying i want her to, but this hurts enough already! I really do love her to bits, id do anything in the world for her, and i dont say it to that many people... Theres proberly only 4 people, and shes one of them! She doesnt even say she loves me... i know its a strong word to throw around, but isnt a relationship based on love? if she didnt love me, then why did she say yes when i asked her out? Its all so confusing at the moment, and i dont know if she really is avoiding me, or if its because of her mom. Yes i understand that her mom may go crazy if Elly told her about me, but she could, just as easily say ok to it all. If i was a parent, i would want my kids to be happy, even if it meant dating someone older then them. Is elly even happy with me? Im so confused and depressed and sad now....
enough about that... i know you are wondering why im actually here when its a work night. Well its that fucking dead, ron decided to close when he got back from his football game. He said town was really really quiet as well. So we closed the pub at half past 9 and im now sat at home.
Will write again when something happens!
Peace xxx
enough about that... i know you are wondering why im actually here when its a work night. Well its that fucking dead, ron decided to close when he got back from his football game. He said town was really really quiet as well. So we closed the pub at half past 9 and im now sat at home.
Will write again when something happens!
Peace xxx
Sunday, 4 January 2009
is it me?
Been working every bloody day this week! Im not complaining, cos im thinking of the money, but we were closed new year day, did a 15 hour shift on the 2nd, an 8 hour shift yesterday, and a 10 hour shift today. Working again, tomorrow with another 8 hour shift then im off for 3 days! yay, i cant wait! I also cant wait for next friday when i get paid! hehe, but most of it is going on bills!
Now, for the whole reason behind the title of this post.... Im feeling down, I have only seen Elly once since before Christmas, and its bloody painful! She said she was going with beth, before she left for Birmingham last friday, and she was gonna pop in to me to see me at work, but she never went, then she said she would "maybe" come into town on saturday... and she didnt... and now its a "maybe" see you tuesday.... Its always a maybe! I really really miss her, and want to spend some time with her! I dont care what we do, i just wanna be with her, but to me it feels like shes seperating herself from me! For whatever reasons, i wish she would just come out and tell me!
Sometimes i wish she could just tell her mom, and her mom would be fine with it, then i could go round whenever! or, forgetting that idea, she could come round to mine! I've offered a few times, but no. Its really getting me worried, and making me depressed ever so slightly. Ive talked to my friends about it and they all say not to worry, but icant help it! I'd go to the ends of earth for her, walk through hell and back... along with doing a few other metaphors!
In other news.... well, there isnt any really!! working lots, got tons of bills to pay with all the money that im making. Tomorrow morning im getting the boxes back down to put all the christmas decorations down.
Will post more later!
Peace xx LOVE YOU ELLY!
Now, for the whole reason behind the title of this post.... Im feeling down, I have only seen Elly once since before Christmas, and its bloody painful! She said she was going with beth, before she left for Birmingham last friday, and she was gonna pop in to me to see me at work, but she never went, then she said she would "maybe" come into town on saturday... and she didnt... and now its a "maybe" see you tuesday.... Its always a maybe! I really really miss her, and want to spend some time with her! I dont care what we do, i just wanna be with her, but to me it feels like shes seperating herself from me! For whatever reasons, i wish she would just come out and tell me!
Sometimes i wish she could just tell her mom, and her mom would be fine with it, then i could go round whenever! or, forgetting that idea, she could come round to mine! I've offered a few times, but no. Its really getting me worried, and making me depressed ever so slightly. Ive talked to my friends about it and they all say not to worry, but icant help it! I'd go to the ends of earth for her, walk through hell and back... along with doing a few other metaphors!
In other news.... well, there isnt any really!! working lots, got tons of bills to pay with all the money that im making. Tomorrow morning im getting the boxes back down to put all the christmas decorations down.
Will post more later!
Peace xx LOVE YOU ELLY!
Thursday, 1 January 2009
YAY
First post for 2009.
Im hoping this year will be better then the last! Lets have a recap! I got with megan, and although it didnt work out, it was fun while it lasted. Got back with Laura, and had my heart broken.... That was really hard on me. Im still not sure how i coped. Had the mess up with Georgie, and im glad thats over cos now im with Elly and im happier then i have been in a long time!!!
Apart from that, its been a rather uneventful year. Another year ailing uni, same as the last. I have made a few new friends which is good.
Talking of Elly, I finally got to see her today, it made my heart miss a beat I was THAT happy! Also saw Beth and her friend Josh from Birmingham. hung out for a while, and it was so great!
I then went to work at 6pm, did a nice 7 hour shift at time and a half, got pissed and saw in the new year. The pub was empty as i predicted! We are in the wrong part of town, and at midnight we had 4 customers! we had big groups come in, but its the usual one pint before they hit the night clubs!
Anyway, ima go bed now! Im still really really happy i got to see Elly today! hehehe
Peace x
And todays tunage is...... Smashing Pumpkins - Doomsday Clock
Im hoping this year will be better then the last! Lets have a recap! I got with megan, and although it didnt work out, it was fun while it lasted. Got back with Laura, and had my heart broken.... That was really hard on me. Im still not sure how i coped. Had the mess up with Georgie, and im glad thats over cos now im with Elly and im happier then i have been in a long time!!!
Apart from that, its been a rather uneventful year. Another year ailing uni, same as the last. I have made a few new friends which is good.
Talking of Elly, I finally got to see her today, it made my heart miss a beat I was THAT happy! Also saw Beth and her friend Josh from Birmingham. hung out for a while, and it was so great!
I then went to work at 6pm, did a nice 7 hour shift at time and a half, got pissed and saw in the new year. The pub was empty as i predicted! We are in the wrong part of town, and at midnight we had 4 customers! we had big groups come in, but its the usual one pint before they hit the night clubs!
Anyway, ima go bed now! Im still really really happy i got to see Elly today! hehehe
Peace x
And todays tunage is...... Smashing Pumpkins - Doomsday Clock
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