Forgotten pasts

Well Well Well... After all this time Cindy has spoken to me! It must be about a year since we broke up and she went out with my mate, and all that.... and I had put it all in the past, and forgotten all about it! I mean, ok, Ive forgiven her and my mate, not that i will ever trust him again, and hardly speak to him. But forCindy to speak to me again was a big shock. She was appologizing and all that and I told her just to forget it all, its all in the past and everything happens for a reason. blah blah blah... And now its like none of it ever happened and shes come out with she still has feelings for me..... I mean... Ok, after speaking to her all day, its brought back some feelings Id rather not have. Istill love her, deeply, but after my best mate breaking us up then her going out with him. And with all the depression and stuff i went through, I still love her, but dont know if i could ever trust her again! What in the hell do I do? And I still have feelings for Lottie! Even though I know thats not going anywhere. I just dont know what to do! I feel lost inside, and havent a clue where my life is going! Why do I always fall in love with girls I cant have!

Enough of that! Im going to sleep on it, and see what happens! Its 4 am and Im not even tired! I cant get back into this routine! It would be murder if i was at college! Half term is going ok! Got some work I really should do! and I havent started it yet! Think I'll do it tomorrow! Damn I miss Lottie! Gonna ring her tomorrow as well! Rang tonight around 11pm and hannah answered! Which means shes gone down without me, which has pissed me off! Not that i could afford it anyway but she could of let me know!


And todays tunage is...... Atreyu - This flesh a tomb